Saturday, 29 January 2011

Saturday, 22 January 2011

Yesterday, i was walking home and to some walking is nothing special, to me most of the time walking is nothing special. God gave me two legs to be used didnt he? But recently, I've been walking more (and yes that has to do with me losing my 16-18 oyster card which gives me free travel on buses) anyway all this walking from A to B has given me a period of the day where i get to reflect.

I know what you're thinking...what has a newly 18 year old girl who is still in school got to reflect on? That's not something i'll disclose on here but sheeeesh, the pressure is mounting for us school kids.

Back to  Friday 5pm; walking home. The sun was setting and the sky was pink, and orange and blue. Now i've seen pictures of the sky when it's like this...but rarely have i stopped and noticed it on my own front door.  Now i'm not really into the whole "romance" thing which i put in quotation marks because what really is romance? But i did think that the sky was picturesque. And, for a split second or two i remembered how lucky i am to be in LONDON living the way i do.

Then my thoughts went back to regular allycat thoughts...Does my butt look big in this? are people staring? Did curiosity really kill the cat? HOW MUCH LONGER TILL PAY DAY? my closet is screaming neglect.  my first pair of designer shoes are not going to buy themselves!

We live our lives with our eyes shut, and why do we only open them when something durastic happens? Don't live your life blinded by lights. Take a moment everyday even if its 30 minutes,  3 minutes or even 30 seconds to remember what you are aiming for in your life and is it making you happy?

If not, it's never ever too late to take a detour.

i gotta find a new place where the kids are hip.

Friday, 21 January 2011

I've always been a classical music gal. I'm not sure whether its because ive got 14 years of classical ballet under my belt so dancing to music that was purely instruments was pretty much all i did for hours each day,week and month. It's amazing how your body connects with music, how easily you can teach your body to flow with the rhythm. Or could it just be that alike every other person classical music really is my way of winding down.

Well 1 bottle of highland spring water & a music score by Hans Zimmer and James Newton Howard later, here i am. Same bed as last night, and this post has completely gone off track.

so i'll probably delete this in the morning.

And that's what you call a wrap.

Thursday, 20 January 2011

i'm sleeping with my blinds open tonight

I'm lying in my bed its 01:35am on well what's now January 20th. I have lucozade in a plastic starbucks cup cup that only 6 hours ago held ice water. The beginning of toothpaste kisses by the Maccabees is playing.

I'm somewhere in between awake and asleep. Can i be honest? This after all is my blog. If i can't be honest with myself who can i be honest with. (Don't answer that)                  

Today/Yesterday i woke up regenerated and with a fresh outlook on how i want my life to plan out. Maybe it was the text i was waiting for that i knew i'd never get, or maybe it was that i've finally set out my goal for this year. Waking up was just the first step. Truth is, words don't describe how excited i am about what this year may hold for me. I think i've sorted my closet for this year all i'm waiting on is my pay slip. the rest is unwritten, or rather its a secret. But heres one secret i don't mind telling....whatever game this boy was playing he'll have to play alone.

You know what they say. As one door shuts, a fire exit opens. But this isn't an emergency so i just unlocked the window and breathed in the air instead.

Tuesday, 18 January 2011

now my eyes are wide open now that every thing's been stolen.

I'm here to get it back from you. I gotta take back what's mine. There it goes i got nothing to show for, except pictures i pose for. & I keep them in a box under my bed.

Here I am, Here I am. So take me as I am.

Monday, 17 January 2011

Men. Pronounced (EM EE EN)

I don't know how i've stuck with blogging with so long. Tried tumblr, tried lookbook, and here i am @ blogger. I must be doing something right. Last week i received 5 emails from girls who have read my blog. Each requesting me to write something particular for them as a form of advice.  I don't know if these girls knew each other or it may even have been the same girl five times. But what they all asked for something that tied into the same topic.

So now, here i am. Sitting on my bedroom floor, shower wet hair and pringles on tap by my side. This is i guess a one off post, for all the girls who think the same way i do but especially to the 5 who were brave enough to ask me to write about something specific. This post may make me vulnerable, but i'll give it a go.

Guys,boys,doodes,males,men, the number one topic on the phone. Where do i even begin.  It has been thought that men are from mars and women are from venus that would explain we do the things we do. I personally think its much simpler than that. Just like girls, guys want to appear unattainable.  That's the most annoying thing for us girls because we always want something we can't have. A Challenge : do we really think that in the end we'll get them? Is that why we open ourselves to vulnerability. One thing i tell my fiends over and over is to be patient. Nothing is ever easy. I also tell them about the whole Kat & Alfie thing on Eastenders but i'm saving that for another post.  But really girls, if theres anything i've learnt in 4 years it's that if you don't take a risk you'll always wonder what if. I'm 18 years old, and sometimes i forget that. People say I'm wise for 18, I'm not i just watch a lot of sandra bullock movies. I've got a whole load of learning to do so don't take my word for it i'm just saying it as i see it being a fellow single girl.

Don't be afraid to step out your comfort zone with a guy. Without making my self too vulnerable, i'll tell you that one thing i noticed i did alot with the guy i like is i stuttered. wow does he make me nervous, just his smile makes me weak (no cliche intended) I hadn't been in a situation where i had been that nervous since my ex and thats how i found myself out my comfort zone. Inside my heart was racing and my mouth seriously wasn't connecting with my mind but i think on the outside i just had a smile on my face. We're all human after all, when i told my friend she said that's normal (whilst giggling)

I think the main thing i'm being asked is how do you know when a guy likes you? The don't. Every guy is different, with some you know with others it takes a while to read them. Trust your instincts you just have to go after what you want and if it doesn't want you back then so be it, it didnt deserve you anyway. The first time i heard that i was about 15 and its stuck with me ever since. I'm no expert on guys, and i definitely cannot speak for them. All you can do is be yourself, forget the game and feel, and hope they do the same. Oh and jesus girls, smile. We all go through that phase where we hope they'll walk by or you'll randomly bump into them. You know it makes you want to smile, so just smile. A smile can go a long way you know. Be silly if you want to be, text them if you want to text them just don't give it all away at once. Just don't be like me, I'm the worst candidate cause i tend to think i'm giving hints and im giving nothing away. That's why people say I'm complicated. Dont analyse what he does as girls we do that ALOT. take it for what it is lil mamas an apple is an apple from the front and from the won't change no matter how many times you look at it.

Oh and a little hint. Let them figure you out, let them unlock your doors and let them unravel your mind. They may not make a move straight away, be patient when they're ready they will. I have no idea if what i'm writing is helping but it's all i can think of. Take them for what they are, don't try and change them.  We're young and life is about having fun right now. Guys will come and go, as long as you don't forget what YOU are about and what you stand for you're doing right. I'm not afraid to write this, but every girl knows that the quickest way to get a guys attention is the two B's (boobs, butt). But if like me, you aren't a show everything girl then that's okay too. We all want to feel sexy and we all want guys to notice us. But sometimes it comes at a price, all the girls ive spoken to agree that mind over matter cause your mind is worth 10x what your body is worth. It might sound crazy but it aint no lie (Bit of Nsync) for you music lovers. What's the point of showing all your goodies at once? Savour them, Eve only let Adam into her garden of eden. And boy, did he appreciate it.  Leave a guy to find out what's lying underneath or better yet let him guess. He just might be surprised when you let him that boudoir.

so sing to your favourite songs, and think about him, talk to him, lust for him and have fun and be silly with him. Cause that's just what girls do no matter what age you are. Do what you do day to day for you, if he notices well then that's a bonus. But no matter what respect yourself. Respecting yourself means he and everyone else around you will respect you too.

Over and Out. Kisses always,


P.s, my hair is dry and curly! that's how long this post took.

life and soul of the party:

(AND I GOT A PICTURE WITH HIM) lucky meeeeee 

Sunday, 16 January 2011

datumamore ad defendendum


In the words of CB(Carrie Bradshaw) I don't believe in email. I'm an old fashioned girl, i prefer calling and hanging up.

I can't believe how fast technology has advanced. When i was growing up yes, we had a television(colour! I'm only a ninties child) but i still preferred to play with my dolls and mini cooking oven. Now at 18 i've realized i'm bad at texting, but good at tweeting that has to count for something?

Now, theres an app for everything. Theres an app to find a lawyer and probably an app which acts as a lawyer. Its too much for me, a girl who still writes people letters and makes scrapbooks.

If theres one thing i couldn't live without it's my camera. I love creating memories with old/new people and being able to look at them and laugh and/or cringe.

Technology is dangerous though. So many people i know say that twitter or facebook has ruined their relationship with people as its become too impersonal. After all, you can't control what people post on your wall.

But shit, life is for living and all this new developments are what brought us into the 21st century.

So let me just finishing this random, unprepared post that doesnt really have much relevance by saying:

I'm a mac and i like my eggs sunny side up.

Tuesday, 11 January 2011

Bruno Mars is the new trend.

This is the young man who has stolen every girl's heart. The Hawaiian 25 year old is a real catch. 
He is not only teaching girls about standards, but he is also showing guys to not be afraid of showing affection. In-fact with Bruno (Real name Peter) showing affection and love is the new thing. 

I first heard Bruno Mars on B.O.B's track "Nothin on you". Since then I've been hooked on his beautifully written lyrics and cleverly shot videos. His smile is enough, but then his smile opens and out comes the song. I'm head over heels and so are most of my girlfriends.  One even said, Bruno wouldn't need to catch a grenade for her, because if he was her boyfriend then would never leave the house let alone the bedroom (which of course would have a permanent guitar in it)

If you haven't yet heard the cutest song ever (besides the way you are) on the planet yet then check out "Grenade" in the video above.

But if he's going to pulling the piano all across town there should only person who i think should be with him, is Vanessa Carlton. 

- A 

Saturday, 8 January 2011


the london look is complete / best birthday pressie ever :)

192 plays in my itunes...

                                                       It's worth more than that though.

no ones found a man for all seasons

 I read an interesting article in ELLE en route to work yesterday


For all of you who don't read ELLE (Which you do know is a sin?) The article ended... " Most women set out to try and change a man. Once they have changed him, they don't like him".

Life is funny, cause change is something we don't like to accept. When you change to a toothpaste your dentist recommended, or changing your hairstyle after 5 years.  It takes a while to adjust to.

I'm a fan of change, or at least i'd like to think i am. Nothing stays the same forever, seasons change and as they change we have to grow and adapt.

I'm a woman now (Hear Me Roar) The morning i woke up 18, I knew i'd changed, mind and soul not yet body haha.

So many of my friends complain that their boyfriends have annoying habits.. but that's just it. Its the little things that only you get to see that make them yours and also in the end make you laugh(sometimes)

We're meant to have flaws, they are what makes you...YOU

I have flaws, infact they are

1.  Sometimes I'm too sensible
2.  Naivety
3.  Impatient
4.  I worry too much
5.  I analyse too much
6.  I laugh at the most inappropriate times
7.  I sing a line of a song over and over and over again till i get it stuck in your head.

But they will probably never ever change.

For me, an 18 year old my bible is ELLE and the sex and the city boxset. I'm a young Carrie Bradshaw/Khloe Kardashian. I know little about relationships! I've only been in one and it lasted a year and several months... but i was young, 16 but one thing i learnt was how secure you feel.

Then again, I feel secure in my Mary Jane Shoes. Do that mean I'd rather have a pair of shoes than a boyfriend?


Centre Parting....

Welcome Back

Friday, 7 January 2011


first time i have ever worn lipstick. This date should be recorded...


I really was on the phone (Bobbie was making me laugh)

Thursday, 6 January 2011

Wednesday, 5 January 2011

Saturday, 1 January 2011

Happy New Year!

New year, new prospects, new people, new designers but same circular trends.

2011 is the year i turn 18. (2 days to be exact)
Lets get started!